I'm bad at eating

Not only am I a slow and messy eater, sometimes I just eat things that are very bad. No I'm not talking fried twinkies, I'm talking about expired and/or raw food.
I'm pretty sure I just ate expired fake crab, I ate it raw with cocktail sauce so I might get very sick soon, but I wasn't paying attention to its peculiar taste because I busy surfing the web. One time I was watching my soap opera of the time, and my Dad came in the living room and said "Jessica why are you eating raw chicken??". As it turns out I must have been so absorbed by Days of our Lives that I didn't notice my chicken hadn't cooked and I was indeed eating raw chicken. Luckily I didn't get sick.
Because I don't learn from my mistakes I have actually drank spoiled milk twice knowing that it was spoiled. My logic was that it didn't taste sour after I put my sugary cereal in, so I didn't care. Got pretty ill twice doing that, hopefully I learned my lesson.
Even when you think you have learned your lessons and know everything the food can trick you. For example, one day in June I was eating some Rice Crispies when I noticed they tasted very stale and gross. However, they were red,white and blue, and it wasn't even July, so there was NO WAY they could be old. I finished off my bowl and then noticed the reason they were red, white and blue was because they were Olympic Rice Crispies. Unfortunately the last Olympics had been a few years before. Oops, luckily I didn't get sick.